This is my one hundredth ramble. I wish I had something pithy to say but unfortunately I’m in a bit of a funk tonight, so nothing spectacular comes to mind right now. I talked to my mother a few hours ago for quite a long time. If you have a mother like mine, she loves you and she wants you to be happy and if she thinks you are happy, she won’t say directly what she is thinking. However, she will hint like hell. So my mom drops plenty of hints tonight and in the back of my head I know she is probably right. She always is.

Mom thinks I want to be liked — who doesn’t? And because of this, I sometimes let people walk over me. I can’t argue with that. I do. Not as much as I used to. You know those people who wipe out an entire family then all the comments you hear are, “He seemed like a nice guy. He was quiet, kept to himself.” Those guys wanted to be liked. See what happened?

Now, I’m not a “wipe an entire family out” kind of guy. I’m not that brazen or mentally f’ed up. I’m not even sure being liked is at the top of my wish list anymore. I just want to be happy. Like an unsullied kind of happiness. The kind where you wake up in the morning, take a deep breath and start singing zip-bee-dee-doo-daa and shit. The last time I did that, I was probably ten. Then puberty kicked my ass, followed by an acne-riddled adolescence, then an adulthood rank with disappointment and complete amazement. If it weren’t for jazz and movies, I’m not sure where I’d be.

I realized something these last few days. Catty women are not attractive. Even less attractive? Catty men. I’ve come to realize that in showing my distaste for certain individuals of the same gender, I was really just putting all of my insecurities on display. Not cute. And women. When they spend so much time verbally expectorating on other women *shudder*. Not a pretty sight.

Let’s see…what else? Hmm…hate Barry Bonds — already ran that into the ground. Although, I read that his ex is going to be in the October edition of Playboy. Seriously, do we really need to see that. Yes! Actually, when people used to say that they read Playboy for the articles, I thought that they were full of shit. But seriously, would you really get a subscription these days to Playboy just for the photos? The internet is rife with photos and much, much more. Fact is, Playboy is a great read. Plus, Hef is a jazz fan, so there’s that.

This is a true rambling post. Ramble…ramble…free association….by the time Lindsay Lohan is thirty, most people will probably look at her and say, “Lindsay Oh Damn!” She’s headed down that road.

Why did they post that video of Beyonce I don’t know why people hate her. She seems genuine to me. But maybe I’m blinded by her obscene hotness.